1990 GI Joe Freefall

1990 GI Joe Freefall Review

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe11 Comments

(Editor’s Note: Today’s review comes from my friend Scott, who has some great insights on GI Joe. Beyond being knowledgeable about toys, Scott is an artist, animator, game developer, and pixel art enthusiast. He’s profiling a figure that was a childhood favorite of both mine and his own. I always enjoy talking to Scott about toys, and I think he dives deeper into some aspects of GI Joe than I ever could. You can find Scott on Twitter as AnimatedTako to read more of his toy musings, see more of his art and photos, and read his thoughts on fighting games.)

Review and Photos by Scott

Freefall felt like a good place for me to start thinking about action figures critically not just because of the obvious leap of faith association I could draw to reviewing a paratrooper, but because I literally cannot remember a time where I was aware of G.I.Joe before Freefall. He and Topside were my first two figures, and most of my strongest early memories of the first house I lived in are framed around the adventures those figures had. Topside was my first figure, selected by my Dad because his first G.I.Joe was also nautically themed, a 60’s Action Sailor. 

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Black Major Tiger Force Snake Eyes

Black Major Tiger Force Snake Eyes

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe13 Comments

Today we’re taking a look at the Black Major Tiger Force Snake Eyes figure, which is probably more accurately a Tiger Force Invasor figure. There’s a lot to unpack with that.

But, I’ll be honest with you– this article is mostly just an excuse for me to voice my opinions about the 1985 Snake Eyes mold. And, to a lesser extent, my opinions of the wild world of Black Major Snake Eyes repaints. 

This isn’t a full review or anything, and I’m also not going to give this figure a rating. I just wanted to get some thoughts out onto the digital page.

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1991 Trash Bag Bunch

1991 Trash Bag Bunch: The Sickest Six

On By thedragonfortressIn Trash Bag Bunch6 Comments

(Editor’s Note: Today’s review comes courtesy of my friend Mild Weasel, who you can find on Instagram. Mild Weasel is a long time friend– we’ve bonded over weird toys, weird comics, and weird music. I have absolutely no familiarity with the subject of his article, Galoob’s Trash Bag Bunch, which is why I’m extra excited to host it! Just look at these malevolent screwballs! And by the way, Mild Weasel is the toy collecting alias of Ben Jeddrie, who Instagrams and Twitters as @zyblonius about many other things also.)

Article and Photos by Mild Weasel

For those of you less familiar, the Trash Bag Bunch are a pretty spectacular line of toys. Sold on blister cards, you would open the pack to take out a sealed amd branded plasticky foil bag. Within that was a papery pouch, resembling the titular “Trash Bag”. This would then be submerged in water, wherein it would dissolve while a hidden seltzer tab would bubble and foam. Reaching into this toxic sludge, you would find a surprise toy! And it was most often pretty dope. Here are a few of my very favourites:

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1989 GI Joe HEAT Viper

1989 GI Joe HEAT Viper Review

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe18 Comments

Today I’m joined by my friend Video Dracula, who just launched a new website! If you enjoy Transformers of all eras, you need to check it out. You can also find him on Instagram and Twitter.

Drac helped write the review and also took a ton of photos for this post. I’m sure you can tell which are mine and which are his.

The 1989 GI Joe HEAT Viper is not technically a 90s figure, but it is a figure I got around 1990 and played with throughout my childhood. I asked Drac if he wanted to collaborate on a review with me, and he suggested this late 80s weirdo. I thought it was a great idea, because what is 1989 if not the dark herald of the 90s to come?

And boy oh boy, does this figure ever foreshadow what would happen in the 1990s with GI Joe.

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My Big Nerdy Weekend: Lukewarm Takes on Snake Eyes and MOTU Revelation

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe5 Comments

It’s a big media weekend for nerds, dorks, and dweebs. Masters of the Universe: Revelation was released on Netflix yesterday and Snake Eyes: GI Joe Origins was released in theaters at some point this week. I’m not looking it up because I’m too busy typing this silly blog post.

I usually don’t get around to watching too many new things and the pop culture zeitgeist usually passes me by. Not because I’m “too cool,” but because I’m bad at actually watching both TV and movies. I have a short attention span.

I’m going to keep these Lukewarm Takes relatively short and pretty much spoiler free.

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1997 Masked Rider KFC Kids Meal Toys

1997 Masked Rider KFC Kids Meal Toys

On By thedragonfortressIn Kamen Rider5 Comments

(Editor’s Note: Today’s post comes from my friend Josh, co-host of the Raging Robot Partycast. Coincidentally, he goes by ‘ragingrobotparty’ on both Instagram and Twitter. Josh is a good friend who posts great toy photos and RC car videos. It’s always a delight to talk toys with Josh, and I’m over the moon about the review he contributed since it might just be the most niche post on this website yet. It also rules. And reading it made me want some mashed potatoes. Take it away, Josh!)

Review and Photos by Josh

Well, time for something weird! I’m Josh, you might know me as ragingrobotparty. Sometimes host of the Raging Robot Partycast, sometimes toy photographer, sometimes radio controlled vehicle enthusiast. All around tall dork with major divorce-dad energy who’s dwelled in the darkest parts of the dial-up internet for far too long. Today I’m here to talk to you about a set of toys from a Kids Meal that I had no idea existed until last year.

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5 Songs that Mention GI Joe and an Oddball Funskool Firefighter

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe, Music5 Comments

Hi there. Today we have another look at a fan favorite Russian Funskool GI Joe figure. We also have some songs, some of which are more unsettling than others.

Your regularly scheduled review will be posted on Thursday. It’s not GI Joe-related, though, so I suggest you get your fill today so you don’t go hungry for the rest of the week.

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Super 7 GI Joe ReAction Figures

Super7 GI Joe: My ReAction

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe23 Comments

Hah! Clever title, right?

Clearly there are many reasons why I am not a professional Toy News Journalist. 

But I do like GI Joe, and I know more about it than I know about microbiology or the history of Reggaeton, so I thought I’d serve you up some stale takes about some fresh new product. 

If you’d like to see the actual press release from Super7, I suggest checking out TheFwoosh.com or Brian Flynn’s announcement video, embedded below. 

I guess I am basically one of those YouTubers who makes millions of dollars from reacting to Star Wars cartoon trailers now. There’s no going back. Let’s move forward and let the Nord VPN sponsorship dollars roll in. 

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1995 GI Joe Extreme Ballistic (Deluxe)

1995 GI Joe Extreme Ballistic (Deluxe) Review

On By thedragonfortressIn GI Joe9 Comments

(Editor’s Note: Today’s review comes from my friend Tyler Martin aka Baltimore Bivouac. He was one of the first people I followed on social media when I started this project 4 years ago– and he was one of the first people to offer to help me out with a guest review. Tyler is one of the few people I know who’s just enthusiastic about 90s toys, as a concept. On his Instagram account, he showcases everything from Kenner DC figures, to Exosquad, to GI Joe, to Toy Biz Marvel, to Lego Ice Planet. And we both love Super Sonic Fighters Psyche-Out. What I’m saying is he has great taste! Today’s review is also a first for The Dragon Fortress– a GI Joe Extreme figure!)

Review and Photos by Tyler Martin

I am a GIJOE Collector that grew up in the 90s. Many of my favorite Joes were neon, Mega Marines Clutch and the recently reviewed Battle Corps Long Arm were regulars (if not the leaders) of my missions. Back then my Joes operated mainly as some sort of undercover organization rather than members of a rank-and-file military team and I was crushed as a 9-year-old when Battle Corps and 3.75 Joes disappeared in ’95.

In their place, kids like me were presented with ‘GI JOE Extreme’ to fill the void.

This blog entry is about Ballistic v2, one of the few figures from that line that is worth having, but we’ll get to him in a minute.

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