1992 GI Joe Shockwave (DEF)

1992 GI Joe Shockwave (DEF) Review

I am a total dummy and forgot yesterday was a “holiday.” So I spent my Thanksgiving cat-sitting, watching Roxette music videos, and heading over to a friend’s house to eat the cooking he spent all day on. He made this really good vegan puff-pastry thing with lentils and veggies in it, along with some killer mashed potatoes. I also tried Cheetos mac and cheese, which was slightly disappointing. So I took the day off.

That means we’re concluding Childhood Favorites Month on a Friday instead of my usual Thursday. Let’s blame the overeating holiday instead of me just totally spacing that there was a holiday at all.

Today, we’re taking a look at 1992 GI Joe Shockwave from the DEF sub-line, who is my final choice for this year’s Childhood Favorites. It was kind of a tough call, since so many figures fit that definition. But Shockwave won out. 

ON the surface, Shockwave v3 is a simple figure from a complicated sub-line. GI Joe’s War On Drugs was waged with more expensive carded figures, all of which included light-up spring-loaded missile launchers. The enemy figures in the sub-line were also actual drug dealers, which was kind of a unique thing for a sci-fi military toy line. I have mixed feelings on the whole thing.

I do not, however, have mixed feelings on the figure itself. Let’s kick open the doors (after we’ve obtained a proper warrant) and take a look at DEF Shockwave!

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I was on the Diary of a Dorkette Podcast!

Hey everyone. No new review post today. Sorry about that.

But in an excellent bit of timing, my friend Miss M just posted the episode of her podcast I was a guest on. We talked about toy store encounters, stealthily buying toys when we were teenagers, text-based online roleplaying games, and gently antagonizing toy fans. Plus, we both list our top 5 favorite 90s toy lines and talk about a Very Important Spreadsheet we’re starting. What more could you want?? Listen below or use this link to catch the episode.

I had the most fun ever being on this podcast and I hope you enjoy it, too.

And please check out Miss M’s website, Twitter, and Instagram for all of her great content. She is easily one of the most creative, funny, and kind people in the entire online toy community. It was a huge honor to work with her.

1992 GI Joe Cobra Commander (Talking Battle Commanders)

1992 GI Joe Cobra Commander (Talking Battle Commanders) Review

1992 GI Joe Cobra Commander (Talking Battle Commanders)

As it turns out, your first time reviewing a Cobra Commander figure is kind of intimidating. The character is such a large presence in the world of GI Joe, and the franchise as we know it literally could not exist without him. There are also a ton of Cobra Commander action figures, each of which has large swaths of fans and detractors. People are passionate about used car salesman/terrorist John Lennon.

And so am I. That’s why it’s taken me so long to review a Cobra Commander figure. I want to get it right. 

Since this is Childhood Favorites Month, today we’re looking at the Cobra Commander from my childhood– the 1992 Talking Battle Commanders Cobra Commander. This figure was a huge part of my GI Joe world growing up, as it gave me a credible version of the terrorist leader I knew from the cartoons, commercials, and comic books. 

You can point out many flaws in this figure and I will objectively agree with you. But the figure is also iconic. And, for people of a certain age, nothing represents Cobra Commander better than the TBC figure. Plus, the colors are nice. 

Let’s hope I do this figure some justice. 

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1993 GI Joe Sonic Boom Tank

1993 GI Joe Sonic Boom Tank Gallery and Quick Review

Hi there. Today we’re doing another gallery post, but I’ll also provide some thoughts on the toy. We’re doing “childhood favorites” this month, which is mostly a thing I’m reserving for my main reviews on Thursdays. But we’ll make an exception for today’s Tuesday post. 

dragon-fortress-childhood-favorites-month

The Sonic Boom Tank, released in 1993 as part of GI Joe’s Street Fighter 2 sub-line, definitely counts as a childhood favorite. I didn’t own a ton of GI Joe vehicles as a kid. I did have some bigger pieces like the Crusader and Fort America, but only had a few small or medium sized vehicles. I got the Sonic Boom Tank in 1993 during a bout of chicken pox, and it became one of my most-used vehicles after that. It was really the most “traditional military” vehicle I had for GI Joe, so it kind of became the go-to vehicle for every mission. 

Before the SBT, I basically just had the Attack Cruiser, which I didn’t love even as a kid. The Crusader was obviously an amazing piece, but it wasn’t practical for ground missions. And, even though it saw a good amount of use, I couldn’t really wrap my head around Fort America as a kid. I was used to Transformers, which had convincing secondary/disguise modes, so a weird tank transforming into a nebulous Pile of Brown was a bit odd to me. That left the Sonic Boom Tank and, a little later on, the Mudbuster as my primary Joe vehicles for the last few years of the ARAH line. 

Let’s dive in and look at some pretty pictures.

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1991 GI Joe BAT

1991 GI Joe BAT Review

Today we’re continuing Childhood Favorites Month with a look at the single figure who made up the backbone of my Cobra army as a kid– the 1991 BAT v2. 

As with the other three figures I’m featuring this month, this one means a lot to me. I’ll try to be objective, but nostalgia has a strong hold over me when it comes to this black and neon android. 

Also note that I’ve included some fairly old photos in this review. Any time you see a BAT without a chest sticker, that’s an old photo. I wanted to include them both because they are amusing and because I want you to see what a 1991 BAT normally looks like– their lenticular chest stickers have almost all fallen off by now. 

Let’s run through the usual childhood stories, the review, and the comparisons. Join me after the break. 

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The Mega Man Soundtrack (1995)

The Mega Man Soundtrack (1995)

In 1998, I was trying to rebuild my music collection. We had a house fire over the summer, so I pretty much lost everything. 

One day at Fred Meyer, my mom told me to go pick out two CDs from the electronics department. I instantly chose Powertrip by Monster Magnet, as “Space Lord” was my summer jam that year. It was instantly appealing to my then-13-year-old brain. I still love all of Monster Magnet’s first four records. Any band that lets their Hawkwind influence shine through so much will always have lasting appeal to me. 

The Mega Man Soundtrack (1995)

But another CD caught my eye, too. It featured a buff-looking Mega Man on the cover, accompanied by his loyal robot dog pal Rush. It was the soundtrack to the Ruby-Spears Mega Man cartoon. 

When I picked up the CD, I only really recognized Skid Row and Sugar Ray on the track listing, but that was enough for me. It came home with me that day.

The CD featured a collection of songs that were used in the ending credits of season 2 episodes. I’ve never seen much of the show, but I remember the toys looking pretty cool. I was also a big fan of the video games and their music. 

The Mega Man Soundtrack (1995)

Since this is an obscure release that means a lot to me, I thought I’d do a retrospective on it and go track by track. Destructoid previously released a writeup on the album, but I found it to be both dismissive and petty. I want to look at the actual songs and see how they hold up and how they (absolutely do not) work in the context of Mega Man. 

I also didn’t buy the actual CD again. It tends to sell for at least $30 (if not way more) on eBay, and I don’t want to support Amazon. Also, the only CD player I own is in my car. So we’ll use YouTube instead. 

If you’d like to save the full YouTube playlist, you can find it here

Feel free to listen to each song as you read my blurb about the track– I hope you find something you like!

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1992 GI Joe Ninja Force Storm Shadow

1992 GI Joe Ninja Force Storm Shadow Review

Every Thursday this month, I’ll be reviewing a favorite GI Joe figure from my childhood. One of the figures I played with the most. The figures who were a part of nearly every childhood adventure. The ones who got dragged through the dirt, flung off the jungle gym at the local park, left at Grandma’s house over the weekend, brought to school hidden in a backpack, and treated carelessly by a child’s unabashed adoration. 

Narrowing it down to only four figures is a daunting task, but I think I’ve figured it out. 

I’m starting with 1992 GI Joe Ninja Force Storm Shadow, who is the pinnacle of “childhood favorites.” This is not a popular figure, but it’s a figure that means the world to me. It was a total game changer that affected every single aspect of GI Joe for me. This figure was my first ninja hero in the GI Joe line. A legendary character. A former bad guy now fighting on the side of the angels. A hooded avenger in white, righting wrongs with an alabaster sickle and sword. 

I’ll do my best to acknowledge the figure’s shortcomings (and there are many) while also singing its praises and describing what it means to me. 

We’ll also discuss its ephemeral nature– nothing lasts forever, not even an iconic ninja warrior. 

Here is the mythical Ninja Force Storm Shadow in all of his flawed glory. 

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Transformers Action Master Jazz KO (Taiwan)

Transformers Action Master Jazz KO (Taiwan)

Transformers Action Master Jazz KO (Taiwan)

In my never ending quest to only publish nice and easy posts on Tuesdays, I remember I had this weird Taiwanese Action Master Jazz KO sitting around. I’d never even opened it before yesterday. Since it’s a garish nightmare and a bootleg of a toy that came out in 1990, I figured it would be perfect for our purposes. And I was right!

This won’t be a full on review, but the combination of photos and brilliant prose should be enough to satisfy your needs.

This is another “gallery style” post, as I feel the images do a lot of the talking for this one. Anyway, put on some bootleg Ray Bans or whatever because this Transformers knockoff is BRIGHT.

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1992 Lanard Corps! Lightning Mobutu

The Corps! Lightning Mobutu (1992) Review

1992 Lanard Corps! Lightning Mobutu

Lightning Mobutu, produced by Lanard for its Corps! line in 1992, is a figure  I’ve wanted to review for quite a while. This week, I got a wild hair and decided to actually do it. 

Several of the photos contained in this review are pretty old. You might even recognize some of them. There’s even one with hilariously bad green screen editing and visible figure stands. It’s a photo I was always kind of historically embarrassed about. But, when I revisited it, I actually found it kind of charming. So it got to stay.

Anyway, please enjoy these old and new photos. 

This review is also a reminder that I need to focus on The Corps! more often. Maybe the next time I can’t decide on which toy line to pull my next review from, I’ll look to Lanard again. It seemed to help me this week. 

So let’s take a look at the figure who might be my all time favorite toy from Lanard’s bold and beautiful sci-fi military toy line. 

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Every GI Joe Toy Line, Correctly Ranked

Every GI Joe Toy Line, Correctly Ranked

Today I’m ranking every GI Joe toy line. Well, within reason. There are some criteria or I’d go absolutely insane. 

Here are my (admittedly very loose and arbitrary criteria):

  1. The toy line was made by Hasbro itself (so no Hot Toys, Sideshow, Super7, or my beloved KRE-O)
  2. The toy line is related to the ARAH iteration of GI Joe (so no OG 12” Joes, Adventure Team, etc)
  3. No Fast Action Battlers, Micro Force, Combat Heroes, etc– I’d go crazy trying to catalog all of those weird side lines from the Modern Era 
  4. I’m not listing 3.75” and 12” figures from these lines separately, with one exception 

That’s it! I’m sure I’m still missing something and I probably screwed up some of the dates. But I promise I did a good bit of research and tried my best. 

Also, I have Very Good Taste in everything, but this is just my list. I’m sure yours would be different. But probably not that different! 

This is already going to be too wordy, so let’s just get to it, shall we?

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