Hello. How have you been? Are you still interested in old GI Joes? Because most of the time I still am.

Today we’re looking at a figure that is absolutely nobody’s favorite. But it’s one I got carded for less than the cost of a Wendy’s combo meal a couple years ago, and I’ve been itching to clip the accessories from the weapons tree, take some photos, and then never think about again.

So here’s 1993 GI Joe Star Brigade Duke from the Armor Tech sub-line.

Let’s get to it.

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Star Brigade Duke (Armor Tech) Review” →

October of 2022 is a very special month here at The Dragon Fortress, because it’s all dedicated to The Most Important Member of GI Joe (some say The Only Important Member of GI Joe)– Specialist David F. Kunitz aka OZONE.

All month long, we’ll be looking at each ARAH version of GI Joe’s environmental safety trooper. Today, we’re starting with both versions of Ozone released in 1993 for the Star Brigade sub-line.

So how does an ozone replenishment specialist work as a combat astronaut? That’s what we’re here to find out.

Welcome to OZONE OCTOBER!

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Ozone (Star Brigade) Review” →

Today on The Dragon Fortress, we’re looking at an odd figure I have neither nostalgia for nor childhood attachment to. It’s the 1993 GI Joe Cyber-Viper, who is one of the strangest figures in the ARAH toy line with an outlandish color scheme.

Those qualifications fit my mission statement perfectly, but my opinion on Cyber-Viper may surprise you. Or maybe not. You could just be really good at reading people, or be reading my thoughts through a 5G tower. Usually I only let the government read my mind but ,since you’re doing it for a good cause (a late 30-something’s opinion on an ancient GI Joe toy), we’ll let it slide this time.

This review also includes a cameo from one of my good friends and all-time favorite internet toy enthusiasts. But that’s a surprise for later.

Anyway, let’s talk about monsters and cyborgs. 

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Cyber-Viper (Mega Marines) Review” →

Well, I finally finished photographing the review I was talking about in my previous post. And wouldn’t you know it– it’s another GI Joe mail away from 1993. I have very few of those (but want basically all of them), so don’t expect it to be a big trend. I just felt like reviewing this figure.

Today we’re talking about the GI Joe Spirit mail away from 1993, who was part of the International Action Force four-pack figure offer. He was sold in a set with Big Bear, Big Ben, and Budo. Let’s hope Hawk doesn’t do roll call in alphabetical order every time he assembles the IAF. Oh, to be an S in a world of Bs.

Let’s take a look at the figure.

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Spirit (Mail Away) Review” →

Hey look, it’s another review I photographed last summer. That means we’re getting to the end of my backlog and I should probably figure out a way to take more GI Joe photos.

But that’s a problem for Future Dustin.

Today, let’s bask in the glow of the Neon Past and spend some quality time with Deep Six version 4, a Mail Away figure from 1993.

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Deep Six (Mail Away) Review” →

Hey, remember that little backlog of photos I mentioned? I decided to finally do a review with some of those photos. Now, please remain calm and don’t rush to congratulate me all at once.

Today we’re looking at one of the most unpopular figures in the entire vintage GI Joe toy line, who also represents one of the most popular fictional characters in the entire world. That’s right! We’re looking at 1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Chun-Li.

That’s a bit of a mouthful, but it is her official title. Well, actually ‘The Strongest Woman in the World’ is her official title, but ‘1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Chun-Li’ is her official Hasbro title.

And boy oh boy, does this toy have ‘1993 Hasbro’ written all over it in shocking blue and yellow.

Let us proceed.

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Chun-Li Review” →

The 1992 Destro is iconic for people of a certain age. The 1992 series of GI Joe was great like that. For kids of the time, the toy line served up great versions of Destro, Cobra Commander, Duke, Storm Shadow, Roadblock, Hawk, Stalker, Wet-Suit, Spirit, and Gung Ho. They were recognizable, cool, and forward-thinking. That 1992 Destro looked like he stepped right out of a Sunbow cartoon rerun. Every kid who was into GI Joe at the time wanted one. 

The 1993 GI Joe Star Brigade Destro figure, on the other hand, is not iconic. In 1993, Hasbro branched out in many different directions with GI Joe and blazed some new trails. It wasn’t always successful, and sometimes the iconography got lost in the shuffle. In an attempt to keep up with other toy lines and pop culture trends, some strange choices were made. 

I was a kid in 1993, though, and was not burdened by the jaded Joe collector mindset. I experienced Armor Tech Destro at a prime toy-loving age, but I still had some opinions on the figure. Obviously I’m going to share my past and present opinions in this review, but I’m going to dig a little deeper than “THIS BIG SPACEMAN ISN’T A REAL GI JOE.” 

Just a little. 

Armor Tech figures are widely hated by older fans because of their reduced articulation. But what did 7-12 year olds think of these toys at the time? I can answer that question. 

There’s a full review here, too, of course. And a special little surprise you’ll just have to click through to see. 

Let’s get to it. 

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Star Brigade Destro Review” →

There’s no guest review today. Instead, it’s a half-guest review. Today, I’m joined by my friend Eric aka Alexx aka Toys and Tomfoolery. You probably know him already. You can visit his website (which he’ll update any day now), or check out his very active Instagram, which features so much good stuff I couldn’t even possibly describe it. He photographs every good toy line you can think, gives exhaustive rundowns of entire toy series, creates funny comics, and just shares his stunning art with the world. I am a big fan.

Eric acquired 1993 GI Joe Long Arm recently, so I asked him if he wanted to do a collaborative review. I’m not sure if he regrets it now, but he said yes. I took about 8 photos or so, but the rest are all Eric. You can tell which are which, I’m sure.

Continue reading “1993 GI Joe Long Arm Review” →